trip to the gold coast

Discussion in 'Humour' started by Dave, Oct 12, 2012.

  1. Dave

    Dave Moderator Staff Member

    bit of a long one ....but soooo funny ENJOY

    This got the whole of Sydney laughing. Read it and you'll see why! Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney.

    The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called 'Mate Match'. The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers 'yes', he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions.

    The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with (phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

    The Harbour City dropped to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you've heard yet. Anyway, here's how it all went down:

    DJ: 'Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?'

    Contestant: (laughing) 'Yes, I have.'

    DJ: 'Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if you win. What is your name? First only please.'

    Contestant: 'Brian.'

    DJ: 'Brian, are you married or what?'

    Brian: (laughing nervously) 'Yes, I am married.'

    DJ: 'Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please'

    Brian: 'Sara.'

    DJ: 'Is Sara at work, Brian?'

    Brian: 'She is gonna kill me.'

    DJ: 'Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?'
    Brian: (laughing) 'Yes, she's at work.'

    DJ: 'Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?'

    Brian: 'About 8 o'clock this morning.'
    DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

    Brian: (laughing sheepishly) 'Well...'

    DJ: 'Question #2 - How long did it last?'

    Brian: 'About 10 minutes.'

    DJ: 'Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake.'

    Brian: 'Yeah, that trip sure would be nice.'

    DJ: 'Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?

    Brian: (laughing hard) 'I, ummm, I, well...'

    DJ: 'This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?'

    Brian: 'Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us for couple of weeks...'

    DJ: 'Uh huh...'

    Brian: '...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time.'

    DJ: 'Atta boy, Brian.'

    Brian: 'On the kitchen table.'

    DJ: 'Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it.
    Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her up.

    You listen to this.'
    [3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

    DJ: 'Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?' (Touch
    tones.....ringing....)

    Clerk: 'Kinkos.'

    DJ: 'Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?'

    Clerk: 'This is she.'
    DJ: 'Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now.'

    Sarah: (laughing) 'A couple of hours?'

    DJ: 'Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to give any\answers away or you'll lose.
    Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?'

    Sarah: 'No.'

    DJ: 'Good!'

    Brian: (laughing)

    Sarah: (laughing) 'Brian, what the hell are you up to?'

    Brian: (laughing) 'Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest.'

    DJ: 'Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off to the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.

    Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

    DJ: 'Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?'

    Sarah: 'Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work.'

    DJ: 'What time?'

    Sarah: 'Around 8 this morning.'

    DJ: 'Very good. Next question, how long did it last?'
    Sarah: '12, 15 minutes maybe.'

    DJ: 'Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?'

    Sarah: (laughing) 'Yes.'

    DJ: 'Where did you have it?'


    Sarah: 'OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?'

    Brian: 'Just tell him, honey.'

    DJ: 'What is bothering you so much, Sarah?'

    Sarah: 'Well...'

    DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?

    Sarah: 'Up the arse.....'

    They had to call an ambulance for the DJ he thought he was going to have a heart attack, he could not stop laughing.
    Apparently there was an unusually high call out of the Sydney Police just after this conversation, for minor traffic collisions.
     
    10 people like this.
  2. curt-sc125

    curt-sc125 oil burner !!! VIP Member

    That is so funny good one
     
  3. bikenutter

    bikenutter VIP Member VIP Member

    I hope they won the prize for that, absolute quality :D

    Sent from my HTC One X using Tapatalk 2
     
  4. Woody

    Woody Super Naked. VIP Member

    Fucking brilliant!!!!
     
  5. Mozzersaints

    Mozzersaints MOZ VIP Member

    i need an ambulance ha ha ha
     
  6. gmercer1

    gmercer1 New Member

    Married AND having sex!!! They must have only got married last week. It will neverrrrrrr laaaaaaast!,
     
    2 people like this.
  7. suzukisue

    suzukisue Inactive

    Ha ha love it :D
     
  8. saintsdude

    saintsdude New Member

    Ha Ha quality lol :D
     
  9. T3D

    T3D VIP Member VIP Member

    Very good! :lol:

    Very true were less that 2 month in and it's gone dry since
     
  10. Dave

    Dave Moderator Staff Member

    Get some of that Drexel lube stuff! That will get her wet and going ! Lol
     
  11. lee

    lee Moderator Staff Member

    best form of contraception known to man.

    The wedding ring
     
  12. suzukisue

    suzukisue Inactive

    said the men with loads of kids :bleh:
     
  13. suzukisue

    suzukisue Inactive

    2 months you should be at it like rabbits :D
     
  14. lee

    lee Moderator Staff Member

    Ha ha. only two sue.

    Not the same when your marching to orders lol.
     
    2 people like this.
  15. gmercer1

    gmercer1 New Member

    Once married the only time you get sex is when it's baby making time!! Expected to stand to attention at a moments notice. Ha
     
  16. Village-Idiot

    Village-Idiot Big Ignorant Fucker From Oldham VIP Member

    Seen that before...Quality
     

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