For The Lexophiles

Discussion in 'Humour' started by Matty-S-182, Jan 22, 2011.

  1. Matty-S-182

    Matty-S-182 What Red Light?

    A backward poet writes inverse.

    A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

    The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.

    You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

    He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

    A calendar's days are numbered.

    A boiled egg is hard to beat.

    He had a photographic memory which never developed.

    The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

    Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

    When you've seen one shopping centre, you've seen a mall.

    If you jump off a bridge in Paris , you are in Seine.

    When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.

    Acupuncture is a jab well done.

    I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

    She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.

    No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

    A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was prosecuted for littering.

    Two silk-worms had a race – the result was a tie.

    Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

    I wondered why the football kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    A sign on the lawn at a drug rehabilitation centre said 'Keep off the Grass'.

    Old soldiers who survived mustard gas and pepper spray are now seasoned veterans.

    Don't join dangerous cults: practise safe sects.
     

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